I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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