Got a toothbrush?
are you so shy because you have an std?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
