Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
