Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
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What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
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So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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