I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
