We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
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