if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Randomize
