I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize