if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
