i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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