Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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