she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize
