can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
