Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
worst night to have a conscience
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
