she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize