That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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