Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
