I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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