I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
