he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
So. Much. Porn.
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