When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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