just survived the first fart of the relationship.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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