you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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