didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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