is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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