apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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