You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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