im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize