the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
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