oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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