she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
