I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
