Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
