So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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