I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
