the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
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