It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize