And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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