The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize