Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
All the doctor said was why
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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