i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
