very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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