You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize