Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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