her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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