i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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