I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
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He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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