hotel room ftw
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
