Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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