i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
